I Got Jacko Off (No Boutros)

It's true.

I sat in the safe confines of Mac's Citadel today and watched the verdicts come across.

I never had a doubt.

Mac was twitching and nervous.

"I told you you should have watched the whole trial you wuss," I said then sailed a cardboard pizza box off his head and got up to pour myself another gin and tonic.

"Hey fuck!" he yelled. "I'm bleeding"

I do not know why I hang with this loser. I guess it's because he laughs at me, let's me do what I wish and I get to hit on whatever woman he is with when he is not looking (I'm much prettier than him).

"The fix was in" I said.

"What fix?"

"Oh your are an idiot. Celebrity is the nation's fix you moron," I said.

It got silent for awhile.

Anyway, what the MacMan does not understand it I put the real fix in weeks ago.

I travelled to SoCal (which, by the way I detest except for the women and that all-night Jewish Deli with the retro look..oh it's not retro because they just let it come back around. I never remember the name...I just say, "take me there"..okay yeah Kantor's).

I personally coached Jackson and his team of head-shaved body-guards on just what to do. Did you notice how many of them there were? Notice they ALL look alike?

They were actually cloned at Neverland in 1990.

The "Pajama Incident" and the physical problems, and other clear signs of complete internal melt-down (I assure you he is quite fine...we played pool that weekend) were all part of my diabolical plan.

So today, as I watched the Black SUV Bees fly toward a verdict I had already laid money on at 15 to 1. Fuckwit Fundamentalist Chickien-Take-O'Bob Magnate Idiots in Colorado greedily took the bet without batting an eye.

They will pay off now and be humilated. They were just asking for a good beating.

No, the above shot is Jacko giving me the private signal in court one day that my plan was in place. He gave me that look shortly before I was tossed from court for smuggling in a bottle of Vodka, a small jar of olives, ice and a shaker.

But we cannot be seen together in public anymore because I am too pretty, slightly whiter, and I'm taller and my hair is longer.

He has his pride, but forgets that I cannot sing a lick, have only sold records when I was broke and my "neverland" is pretty literal.

So anyway, I was happy for him today. For weeks we secretly conferred on the "impotence" defense. The last night in a hospital ploy was sheer genius thank-you. I sent pizza to the jurors with a note "It's his back!".

I did all of this for free. I did it because you can still do almost anything in California if you are smart and evil.

They came back with the 10 counts of not guilty today, which I knew they would.

The only shadow in all of this is "the Boutros", who has either cloned his sexually abusive self or there is more than one "Boutros" out their (No Boutros) .

Boutros Boutros-Ghali does not count, because, as we all know one "Boutros" cancels everything out. So, in fact a more literal translation of the UN Secretary's name would, in fact now be "Boutros-(No) Boutros-Ghali". This leaves him a non-Boutros.

Or just Ghali. Bono. Sting. Ghandi. Ghali.

Unlike "The Boutros" or his smarmy offspring.

So today, lovely Lindsey sent me this link on a Boutros sighting at the Jacko trial.

http://music.yahoo.com/read/news/12174904

The Boutros at work yet again...and in a Child Molestation case...imagine that.

And he wants more "access".

No Boutros.